Politically Incorrect Transcripts From May 1, 2000

Politically Incorrect Transcripts From May 1, 2000
Posted by FoM on May 03, 2000 at 13:01:11 PT
Broadcast From Maricopa Tent County Facility
Source: Politically Incorrect 
Bill's Opening Bill: Thank you very much.Of course, you'd cheer for anything --you're out.[ Laughter ]But we are very appreciative.We're here at the Maricopa Tent County Facility, and, you know, I tell you, they have invited me to spend the night here.
Sheriff Joe did.I don't know.I looked at the tents that you live in.And, you know, there's upper and lower bunks.I got a little nervous when a guy said, "I'll take the bottom."[ Laughter ]I didn't know what that means here at the jail.[ Applause ]Now, on this show, we have the proprietor here.Sheriff Joe is gonna be on our show.I know he's very popular with you guys.Uh --[ Audience booing ]He is known, of course, as the toughest sheriff in America.That's his title -- "The Toughest Sheriff."Of course, he earned that title 20 years ago when he worked as a male stripper.Uh, that's --[ Laughter and applause ][ Cheers and applause ]I kid, Joe.I think he's just an old softy at heart.For example, I don't know if you know this, but Joe has been married to same woman for 44 years.And, in that entire time, he only sent her to the hole six times.I mean, come on, people.[ Cheers and applause ][ Laughter ]No, he is known for his tough tactics here.I mean, the food, I don't wanna go into it.We've talked about it before.I mean, it's basically green baloney and moldy bread.That's what you get.[ Cheers and applause ]But, wait, that moldy bread comes in handy.'Cause, with all the unprotected sex, at least you guys can make your own penicillin.[ Cheers and applause ]Yeah.So the food stinks, you get no cigarettes, no coffee -- right? --No pornography.TV is restricted.No even weight lifting here.Can't even do weight lifting.In fact, here, the only time you can clean and jerk, is in the shower.[ Laughter ]I tell ya --[ Applause ]Panel Discussion All right.Let's meet our panel.He has been in the big house for burglary, and now he's serving eight months for possession of dangerous drugs.All around, four-class felon, Stephen Russo right over here!Stephen![ Cheers and applause ]Hey.Thanks for coming by.As the executive director of Amnesty International, he's filed a handful of grievances against this very facility --Dr. William Schulz.Doctor![ Cheers and applause ]How are you, Doc?Right there, Doc.All right.The man in charge, you all know him, you all love him.He's your charming host and your worst nightmare, Sheriff Joe Arpaio.[ Audience boos ]They love you, Joe.Don't let that sound fool you.They really love you.[ Laughter ]They're chanting "Joe."A hilarious comedian -- oh, boy, he is -- and the fine star of "The Hughleys" Friday nights at 8:30 right here on ABC, which I'm sorry you can't get -- D.L. Hughley, ladies and gentlemen![ Cheers and applause ]How are you?Okay, well, good to have you here, everybody.And, sheriff Joe, I wanna ask you this.Now, you are a sheriff.And I don't understand this -- that we are still electing sheriffs.Because, this is, after all, not the old West.It is the 21st century.We did that when we were a young country.But doesn't electing a sheriff turn the sheriff into a politician?Sheriff Joe: If I wasn't, I wouldn't be on this show, number one.So, thank you.It's great to be elected.Number two, if I was appointed, I would've been fired seven years age.Stephen: Amen.Sheriff Joe: There'd be no striped uniforms, no tents, no nothing.You know that.Bill: But, that's what your critics say.They say you do these things as stunts to get elected --Sheriff Joe: Oh really?Bill: -- because you are forced to become a politician by running for election.Stephen: This is a stunt.Sheriff Joe: Is it a stunt saving the taxpayers $70 million?D.L.: Wait a minute.Wait a minute.Dr. Schulz: Let's talk about that!Let's talk about that![ Cheers and applause ][ Talking over one other ]Stephen: Pink socks and pink underwear.Come on.Come on.This is a stunt.Dr. Schulz: Let's talk about what the sheriff has done with the taxpayers' dollars.$10 million, Maricopa County has paid to settle liability claims --Sheriff Joe: That's a lie.Dr. Schulz: -- because of what you --[ Cheers and applause ]Stephen: I want to know why you're violating people's civil's rights.Why are you feeding people outdated food and charging them for outdated food?Why are you charging unsentenced inmates for food?Why are you charging D.O.C.-sentenced inmates for food?Sheriff Joe: Well, okay, I don't --[ Cheers and applause ]Bill: Wait a second.Okay.But don't people forfeit their civil rights when they commit crimes and get sentenced to prison?D.L.: Certainly everybody wants to be tough on crime.But some of the things you do, like the no-vacancy signs and making these men -- they're men.I don't care what they did.They still --[ Applause ]And they're men and women and children sometimes that we're gonna see, 90% of 'em, back in society.And you take their dignity.I wish you'd give them much help as you did hell, 'cause this is ridiculous.Sheriff Joe: Wait a minute, we have --[ Cheers and applause ]D.L.: And, when you are a politician, that no-vacancy sign is so that your constituents can drive by and see Joe's doing a good job.You make these people where those uniforms so you -- you blow out their kettle to make yours burn brighter is what you do.Sheriff Joe: You know why they wear the uniforms?D.L.: Because you say they do.Sheriff Joe: You know why they wear the pink underwear?You know why?Because they smuggled out $60,000 of white underwear.They don't like pink.That's why I have them in pink.Stephen: Let me stamp the underwear.Sheriff Joe: There's a rationale for everything we do here.Dr. Schulz: Now, there's a name, sheriff, that I don't think you'd like to hear, and that's John Hepburn.John Hepburn is a professor at the Arizona State University, who you hired, paid $20,000 to prove that your policies, pink underwear, green baloney and so on, would not result in greater return of people to prison.That it would keep people out of prison, right?Now what did Dr. Hepburn find out?He found out, that, before you were sheriff, 61% of the people returned to prison.And, after you became sheriff, 62.3% of the people.[ Cheers and applause ]Sheriff Joe: That study was done before the chain gangs.By the way, you don't like the chain gangs, do you?Dr. Schulz: The chain gangs are a violation of international human rights.Sheriff Joe: Oh, is that right?Stephen: Absolutely.Absolutely.[ Cheers and applause ]Why are people on the chain gang?People on the chain gang were put there for administrative write-ups.Administrative write-ups according to the supreme --Sheriff Joe: No, you all volunteer.Everybody volunteers.[ Audience boos ]Stephen: No, according to the Supreme Court, when you give someone an administrative write-up, it is for reclassification only.It is not for permanent no work.It's not to keep them in a cell for 23 hours lockdown.Sheriff Joe: By the way, Bill --Stephen: And, then, if they want a reprieve from that, then you have to go to the chain gang and shave your head.D.L.: The bottom line is, that, as far as to my understanding, most of these inmates are here to be bound over for trial.That means, even in this country, they're innocent until proven guilty.Everywhere -- even in the United States.Sheriff Joe: They don't have a first or second-class food service.Everybody eats the same.D.L.: But how do you hope to change these men's life around in the six months that they're waiting for trial?Sheriff Joe: I will ruin my reputation, okay?D.L.: I don't think you gotta work hard to do that.Stephen: Oh, you're a politician again now.Sheriff Joe: We have some great programs here.The first high school in the nation for the juveniles over there.A drug rehabilitation program that we graduated 1,000, and only 14% came back.Okay, you happy with that?Or don't you believe it?Dr. Schulz: Look, there are a lot of reasons not to believe you and not to believe a lot of your statistics.[ Cheers and applause ]We know for example that the state auditor general found out a few years ago that you had misappropriated $122,000 in state funds.[ Cheers and applause ]Sheriff Joe: That is --Dr. Schulz: And you had spent $12,000 of it on videotapes of your television appearances.Sheriff Joe: Oh, is that right?Dr. Schulz: Is that not true?Sheriff Joe: Sure.I wanna make sure I can see bill.I'm gonna spend a little more to make sure I get his program.Dr. Schulz: Is that true or not?Is it?Sheriff Joe: No, there is reason, see, 'cause when I --Bill: I have to say that that's reasonable, Doc.I mean, you know --[ Laughter ]Sheriff Joe: The $12,000 is true.I'm giving the rationale why --Stephen: I'd like to ask a question.Sheriff Joe: Just a minute.Bill: You can ask it --Sheriff Joe: Just to see people like you, who want to sue the sheriff.So I have the documentation.Dr. Schulz: It was the justice department that wanted to sue you, sheriff.Sheriff Joe: And everything went okay.Dr. Schulz: Oh, it went okay?That's why -- yeah -- that's why --[ Cheers and applause ]Bill: Hold this, folks.I gotta take a commercial.[ Cheers and applause ]---[ Cheers and applause ]Bill: Okay.Sheriff Joe is here in the lions' pit.Dr. Schulz --Sheriff Joe: Hey, I love this place.Bill: I know you do.This is your home.This is your crib.[ Laughter ]Doc, you're going at him pretty hard.I understand that you're from Amnesty International.I am a big fan of Amnesty International.But, when I give to Amnesty International, and I do, it's because they write me a letter saying that the conditions of the prisons in Syria, because people are being tortured in Iraq.Dr. Schulz: That's true.Bill: And I say, "Okay."But this is America.And this is a tough detention center.We've interviewed a lot of these guys.They all have a story.And, quite frankly, most of it is [ bleep ].Why should I have sympathy for this place in comparison to when I give to the people who are being tortured around the world?Dr. Schulz: Well, look, I'll tell you exactly why you gotta care about what happens here.Because every one of these guys is gonna be back out on the streets.That's why you gotta care.A prison is indeed for punishing people.If they've been convicted justifiably, they should be punished.But it is also for rehabilitating.And it is not for so stripping of dignity, it is not for brutalizing -- as the justice department found with stun guns to testicles when someone is strapped in a restraint chair.[ Cheers and applause ]It is not for that, because, Bill, these guys, and 90% of everybody who's in America's jails and prisons, are gonna be back out on the street.So, if for no other reason that we don't wanna send people who have brutalized further than they may have been already in their childhoods, we don't wanna send them back onto the streets without the kind of skills, without the kind of support they need.Bill: But I think most people are saying when they hear you say that is, it's not the brutalization that they are getting, it's the brutalization they have been giving to their victims.Dr. Schulz: Look, first of all, a good percentage of the people here are in here for misdemeanors.But, second of all, fair enough, some of these guys, I'm sure, have brutalized other people.And I don't apologize, I don't defend that for one minute.They should be punished for that.They're in a prison.No one is saying that there shouldn't be prisons in this country.Bill: But, no one is starving.I mean, nobody even looks gaunt.Stephen: An individual that comes in here withdrawaling from heroin and can't get any medical attention, tells people he's withdrawaling from heroin, he's got other inmates picking him up off his rack because the cop will not give the other inmate the food to bring to him because he can't get out of his bed.He can't get medical attention.What about the people who have to fall down on the floor in front of the door to get seen by a nurse -- a nurse's assistant, excuse me?Bill: Well, you now, you're talking about withdrawaling from heroin.Either he's gonna get heroin in here, which is probably easier to get here than on street, or it'll be the one time in his life where he can't get --Stephen: Withdrawaling from heroin can kill somebody.They can die from that.Bill: Withdrawal from heroin can kill somebody?Stephen: Yes, withdrawal from heroin can kill you.D.L.: A large number, I'm not going to quote statistics, are in jail for drugs and drug-related offenses.We need to stop that at its core or we're gonna keep building jails.That's all we're gonna keep doing.And, these people, we're gonna see them again.Bill: I couldn't agree with you more, but that's not his problem.That should take place between the voters and the corrupt politicians they elect.D.L.: But, see, jails -- let me tell you something.Jails are so people feel better.Bill: Exactly.D.L.: Jails are so people go, "Well, we did something about it.We locked the bad guy up."Bill: And that's why I started the show by saying we shouldn't be electing a sheriff.Because, when you have to elect a guy, then he has to run on a platform of "I'm gonna be tougher than the last time.You know what I'm gonna do now?"Sheriff Joe: Aw, come on.Bill: What?Stephen: Joe, Joe, Joe -- can I ask you a question?I was gonna ask you a question.Sheriff Joe: I spent 38 years in law enforcement.And 30 with the U.S. Drug Enforcement Administration, okay?I didn't run for sheriff to take a car home.I ran to make a difference -- do things different.Not a typical bureaucrat or a politician.Dr. Schulz: This is different.Sheriff Joe: I am not a typical bureaucrat.Bill: Any time you run for office, Joe, you're a politician.When you're running, you're a politician.[ Cheers and applause ]Sheriff Joe: I'm gonna tell you something, that, he -- he should go back where he came from and let the 3 million people in this county, who elected their sheriff, decide on how to run this system.Dr. Schulz: But, let's expose him.Let's expose some things the sheriff's doing.Sheriff Joe: He should go back -- just a minute.He should go back to Iraq or these underdeveloped countries and keep out of Maricopa County.That's what he should do.Stephen: Let me ask you a question.Is two inches of standing sewer water in a jail cell normal?Is that cruel and unusual punishment?Bill: What do you mean standing sewer?Stephen: Two inches in that pod there -- "D" tower -- two inches of standing sewer water.I worked in there three days ago.The cops would not let them out of their cells.I said, "There's empty cells over there."The cop said -- excuse my language -- "Let 'em wallow in their [ bleep ]."He said, "Let 'em wallow in it, I don't care."Two inches of water.I couldn't even clean it up.They wouldn't give me boots to clean it up.They said "Let it stand there.I don't care.Don't even clean it up."There's chunks floatin' in there.He lets it stay there.He says that's normal lockdown.There's a guy in there just 'cause he won't cut his hair.That's standard incarceration.This is privilege here.Standard incarceration for Joe Arpaio is 23 hours lockdown and if the toilet overflows --Bill: What about that, Joe?What about the sewer water?Sheriff Joe: I don't know what he's talking about.Stephen: What do you mean you don't know what I'm talking about?[ Audience booing ]You go in there and spend the night, the rats are this big.Sheriff Joe: What do you think this is, a Hilton Hotel?Stephen: Hey, do you have sewer water in your backyard?Sheriff Joe: I sure do.I sure do.It rains once in a while.Stephen: You talk to the Supreme Court and ask them about that in there.Sheriff Joe: We just wrote to the Supreme Court, and they ruled in our favor of taking away your nude magazines.Stephen: I don't care about nude magazines.I don't need nude magazines.Sheriff Joe: Well, you may care about water, I care about nude magazines.D.L.: So you have a vested interest -- honestly, you have a vested interest.Honestly, if the world turned right all of a sudden, and there were no more jails, you wouldn't be working.Sheriff Joe: Oh, I'm really worried about it?D.L.: You wouldn't be working here.Sheriff Joe: Do you really think I need this job?Come on.D.L.: You have a vested --Sheriff Joe: Oh, really?D.L.: The way you treat these people --I've seen men like you my whole life.Men who do things to make themselves feel better about being better than somebody else.Sheriff Joe: Oh, is that right?D.L.: That's what you do.That is what you do.[ Cheers and applause ]Anytime you take a man's dignity away from him -- I mean, if a cat has warrants, he should have to wallow in feces?Sheriff Joe: How do you know that?D.L.: Because, you know what?I'm reading the same stuff he's reading.Sheriff Joe: Well, I'll tell you what you do.D.L.: And I'm not one of these -- I can read.I didn't go to your thousand-figure school.Sheriff Joe: Let me tell me you what you do.D.L.: I know what I'm doing.[ Cheers and applause ]Sheriff Joe: You two guys, after this show is over, okay --D.L.: After this show is over, I'm gettin' out of Phoenix so I don't end up in here with you.That's what I'm doing.[ Cheers and applause ]Bill: Hold that thought.I gotta take a break.We'll be back.[ Cheers and applause ]---Announcer: Join us tomorrow from Maricopa County Jail when our guests will be comedian John Fugelsang, former Federal Prosecutor Barbara Olson, inmate Lorna Hudson and inmate Tyrus Jones.[ Cheers and applause ]Bill: All right.Joe, you wanted to respond to the --Sheriff Joe: Bill, one answer.1 million people have come through my jail system.You know that, since I've been the sheriff?1 million.One or two problems.And you keep taking that piece of paper you carry around with you all the time.Dr. Schulz: 1 million people.You know, Arizona and Maricopa County has an incarceration rate that is equal only to the country of Russia, which has the highest incarceration rate.Sheriff Joe: Maybe you should go to Russia and straighten that out.Why are you here?Dr. Schulz: We are here because there are serious human rights' violations.Yeah, well, there have been.Bill: Didn't you kill a guy here?Dr. Schulz: He certainly did.Scott Norberg died here when he was in the restraint chair.[ Talking over one other ]Sheriff Joe: 1 million people -- no one has died in this tent city.Dr. Schulz: Well, no, but under your custody.Under your custody.[ Talking over one other ]Sheriff Joe: One person out of 1 million people.Bill: Let me ask a more serious question, because we try to get our inmates to give us insight into the prison.What if your roommate's a snorer?What do you do?I mean, is there a bulletin board that you can get another roommate?Stephen: Kick the bed.Kick the bed, and tell them to roll over.Sheriff Joe: Bedtime stories --Stephen: Oh, didn't we go --oh, let me ask you about the bedtime stories.Bill: Yeah.Stephen: Vietnam.Tokyo, concentration, re-education camps.They put up these speakers and they say, "America's a whore --"and they make people listen to this [ bleep ].They don't wanna listen to the bedtime stories.You mandate memo says it has to be on full volume.It cannot be turned down.It is not an option.I don't wanna hear that.Bill: So, what you are talking about is that, at night, Joe has bedtime stories broadcast over to the -- everybody has to listen.D.L.: And, you know what?This is funny, because you got 1 million served, and bedtime stories.This is turing into McDonald's.[ Laughter ][ Applause ]Bill: And you are saying that that constitutes brainwashing?Stephen: Yes, absolutely.Bill: But maybe the criminal brain needs a little washing.Stephen: But maybe it's up to me to decide what laundry soap that I'm gonna use.Okay?I don't want use Joe Arpaio cyanide-laced laundry soap.[ Laughter ][ Applause ]Bill: Wait a second.You're saying there's cyanide in the soap?Stephen: Well, I'm saying that -- didn't they do subliminal messages at supermarkets and at department stores -- "Don't steal, be honest" -- under the music?Bill: Hey, we do 'em on this very show.Stephen: What's behind the bedtime stories?Bill: I very often say, "Watch and buy these products."Stephen: There you go.There you go.Bill: "Watch and buy these products."[ Cheers and applause ]---Bill: All right, let me ask our inmate, if they could -- if Joe could restore just one privilege, what would it be?What would you want most?Stephen: One privilege?Bill: One privilege.Would you want back cigarettes?Stephen: Cigarettes or coffee.Or both.Bill: And, when you get out, what would you want immediately?Would you want good food or sex right away?Stephen: Well, see, that's the problem.When I get out, I immediately go for the sex and the things that follow it, and I end up right back in here.[ Laughter ]Bill: What follows sex that puts you back in here?Stephen: Well, usually, the girls show up, and they got the little bit of dope or whatever, and they --Bill: I get it.All right, we gotta go!See ya tomorrow![ Applause ]May 1, 2000 Guests on this program were:  D.L. HughleySheriff Joe ArpaioStephen RussoDr. William SchulzTranscripts from Politically Incorrect On May 1, 2000Politically Incorrect with Bill Maher Politically Incorrect Article:Incorrect Looks At Jail's Grim Realities
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Comment #8 posted by dddd on May 04, 2000 at 20:40:11 PT
I agree,last nite wasnt that relevant to the issue.....dddd
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Comment #7 posted by FoM on May 04, 2000 at 13:14:10 PT
Hi dddd,I said I was going to post the transcripts from PI. I don't think I will do last nights show because it really didn't hit on drug policy issues and I wanted to mention that. I will post the transcripts as long as they relate to drug policy issues in one way or the other and I will watch for sure again tonight!Peace, FoM!
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Comment #6 posted by FoM on May 04, 2000 at 09:35:54 PT
Troubling Show
Hi dddd,I watched the program last night but last night was a very troubling show for me. How can anyone get in trouble and get caught over 60 times and expect anyone to believe that he has reformed this time again? The young girl was far from innocent too. I'm glad they showed us people that no one knows how to feel about. I guess we will always have prisons and that makes it sad but they are necessary.Peace, FoM!
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Comment #5 posted by dddd on May 04, 2000 at 00:51:36 PT
Another excellent show.I must again make the comment;that,even though humor may tend to make people take serious topics lightly,there is no way network TV would be ALLOWED,to approach such issues as are discussed on PI,,,were it not for the humor factor. It is a two edged sword however,because making fun of things,tends to diminish the serious nature of the topics,yet there is no way you would ever see this stuff discussed on national TV,were it not for the satirical,and humorous approach.........dddd
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Comment #4 posted by dddd on May 03, 2000 at 22:47:03 PT
FoM.........Thank You! You're the best!Sincerely....dddd
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Comment #3 posted by FoM on May 03, 2000 at 20:32:26 PT
I'll post the transcripts each day this week
Hope everyone watches Politically Incorrect again tonight! I will and am taping it for friends that won't be able to see it tonight or this week. I'll post the transcripts each day so everyone can at least read what was said but watching it is so much better!Peace, FoM!
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Comment #2 posted by dddd on May 03, 2000 at 18:58:44 PT
Right On!
Professor Nemo has once again given us an eloquent commentary. There is a strange lack of real criminals in our jails.The "crime",of being busted on a drug charge,pales in comparison to the egregious,and heinous crimes commited by those who are in government,and those who can pay for immunity. It aint pretty.We can still work to try and change things,but quite frankly,small changes in drug laws,will cause minimal change in the way things are...Why?...because the billion ton demagog gravy train,is comin' down the track,and will not let anything slow it down. The federal situation is indeed grim.The only hope for changing things,is within state laws,which are rapidly becoming more and more neutralized by federal mandates,and legistlation that is infested with clandestine attachments,that have nothing to do with the title of the bill.The average citizen would be appalled to see what is being done on capital hill.If the national news media was really able to report things that were important to the public,and had a major effect on their lives,,;The evening news would have a daily account of what went on that day in the senate and house. Joe Public would be shocked and outraged if he was made aware of what is actually going on! As I said before,the real criminals,are the ones making sure the jails are full.Spending more on law enforcement is a joke,when one considers the almost complete absence of law enforcement amongst those who make the laws. There are no police looking into the real world class crimes,or seizing assets or records,or breaking down the doors of  the "good ol' boys". Things dont look that good,but we must keep on,keepin' on.......dddd 
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Comment #1 posted by kaptinemo on May 03, 2000 at 13:43:12 PT:
Andersonville, revisted
During the American Civil War, both sides operated concentration camps for captured soldiers. The most infamous of which was Andersonville. There were no buildings to house prisoners, so many died of exposure. Food was barely recognizable as such. A wretched stream full of human refuse running through the middle of the camp was the sole source of water. Disease was rampant. Prisoners were shot out of hand. To say that life was miserable is to make an understatement. Given the statements of the prisoner on this show, the only thing that's missing are the gray uniforms and kepis of the Rebel guards. After the war, the monster who ran Andersonville was hung for his inhumanity. But Arpaio gets applauded by many whenever he makes appearances. Why? because he is 'tough on crime'. But *who* is he tough on? How many high level drug lords are enjoying his accommmodations? How many white- collar, drug-money-laundering bankers are choking on his green baloney?The very people who should be there will never be. Because in reality, Mr. Arpaio owes his very existence to the same high level crooks that indirectly provide him with his livelihood. And he knows it. Like every fascist, he knows that there are some lines he dares not cross; despite his seeming invincibility, he is beholden to forces much greater than he. And he takes great care lest the beast that made him...eats him instead.
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