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  Potheads Help To Build a Better America

Posted by CN Staff on October 02, 2007 at 06:51:07 PT
By Jeff Ackerman 
Source: Union 

California -- So one guy is dead and another is in a hospital with bullet holes after a reported weekend shoot-out near North San Juan over some pot. You know ... the green, leafy substance one out of every 10 doctors says will ease your pain faster than a pill-popping Rush Limbaugh could shout, “Liberal Potheads!”Enough of the reefer madness already. I know a friend-of-a-friend’s-friend who smoked pot once or a thousand times, and he never once put a cat in a microwave or shot heroin into his big toe.
In fact, the only way you’d ever know he enjoys his pot is if you looked in his pantry and saw the 1,000 packs of Oreos and 500 jars of Costco jumbo peanut butter.My pot-smoking (sometimes he eats it with milk and cookies) friend-of-a-friend’s-friend doesn’t look like someone the FBI would bother pursuing. Not with Osama bin Laden still on the loose and federal agents still wondering what happened to the guy who jumped out of a jet plane with millions of dollars and a parachute. The pothead I know is semi-retired, has snow-white hair and goes to bed by 9 p.m., mostly, I suspect, because he eats too much pot and gets tired.Just so you know, there is a BIG difference between pot and ... say ... crank. All you need do is compare the user profiles.A typical pothead is generally:1. Mellow. 2. Not an early riser.3. Casual dresser (buttons can be problematic).4. Romantic (hence the late mornings).5. Weight-challenged (there is no Oreo/peanutbutter diet).A typical crankhead, by comparison, is generally:1. Hyper (they can vacuum an entire block in one hour).2. An early riser (mostly because they never sleep in the first place).3. Romantic (at least until their teeth fall out).4. Casual dresser (they eventually sell their wardrobe to pay for the crank).5. Weight-challenged (they sell all of their Oreos and Peanutbutter to the potheads and get very skinny).And before any of you start suggesting that a pothead eventually becomes a crankhead, stop. It’s not true. Lots of potheads have never tried crank and lots of crankheads have never tried pot. The government wants us to believe that because it allows them to continue to trade pot for oil. That’s right, Americans. My friend’s-friend’s-friend says he heard about the government plot from a guy he buys Oreos from at WalMart. He says that all that pot the DEA guys take from the farms around North San Juan goes straight to Washington, D.C., where they grind it up into a boatload of brownies and ship it to Saudi in exchange for a few barrels of oil. As you know, it’s hard to grow pot in the desert, even with all the heat, and those sheiks like to kick back on those giant floor pillows listening to Michael Jackson’s greatest hits.How else can you possibly explain why the federal government keeps putting heat on the potheads and their crops that could, if taxed properly, fund parks, roads, schools and a gigantic crankhead rehab center? That’s right, Americans, potheads helping crankheads, in cooperation with the FBI and Internal Revenue Service. And if we can finally decriminalize pot we won’t need to keep building prisons to house potheads and their suppliers. Last time I checked, they were stacking inmates six high at San Quentin and paying the guards $100,000 per year, with medical benefits and an unlimited supply of rubber gloves.According to one estimate, the state spends $160 million per year to arrest, prosecute and imprison marijuana offenders. Our prisons house around 173,000 people today, and seven of every 10 of them we release eventually wind up behind bars again. Yet the state is about to spend another $7 billion or so to build new prisons and add new beds. This at a time when our schools could use some money and our medical-care costs are out of reach for many families. What’s wrong with this picture?They also estimate that taxes from pot sales could generate as much as $3 billion per year.“Yes ... but won’t that lead to more pot use?” you ask once again. I don’t think so. Why would every single Californian start smoking pot when they have pain pills, booze and Viagra? Besides, half the fun is breaking the law.One thing I’m fairly certain of is this: If pot were legal today, one guy would probably still be alive and another would probably not be in a hospital with bullet holes in his skin.Jeff Ackerman is the publisher of The Union. His column appears on Tuesdays. Source: Union, The (Grass Valley, CA)Author: Jeff AckermanPublished: October 2, 2007Copyright: 2007 The UnionContact: letters theunion.comWebsite: http://www.theunion.com/CannabisNews -- Cannabis Archiveshttp://cannabisnews.com/news/list/cannabis.shtml

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Comment #16 posted by Toker00 on October 03, 2007 at 09:12:55 PT
Hope 
My regards. Has he come to yet?Toke.
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Comment #15 posted by Hope on October 02, 2007 at 12:12:46 PT
This article
Prohibition kills.Prohibitionists would truly rather there be more dead bodies because of prohibition than live ones that are free to use cannabis. In case you don't see it clearly... that's insane.
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Comment #14 posted by Hope on October 02, 2007 at 11:53:31 PT
Thank you, Whig.
Nobocy has said anything to me using the term, Emergence Delirium, but it sounds exactly like what is happening to him. 
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Comment #13 posted by whig on October 02, 2007 at 11:43:49 PT

Hope
I know what you are saying about the risks to his thrashing though, and that's something I hope the hospital can manage. Children are a lot smaller and easier to restrain.
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Comment #12 posted by whig on October 02, 2007 at 11:42:09 PT

Hope
What I found about Emergence Delirium is that it is temporary, however distressing. If that's what your friend has, he should recover.
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Comment #9 posted by Hope on October 02, 2007 at 11:26:05 PT

searching the internet
Emergence Delirium seems to be what is happening to my sweet friend. It's rare and not well understood because the incidents of it in adults has not been well investigated. They understand more about it in children than in adults. He could really hurt himself. Besides the possibility of tearing out all the necessary tubing and stuff, he could cause himself hemmorageing and damage and pain. His thrashing could seriously damage the work done in the operation.The operation, a quadruple bypass, apparently went very well. They just can't wake him without him going into that very dangerous struggling. Even strapped down where he can't reach his tubing, he couuld do bad damage internally.
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Comment #8 posted by FoM on October 02, 2007 at 11:19:20 PT

Hope
I do know from experience trying to bring a person out of a chemically induced coma can be hard with thrashing. My son pulled a tube out of his chest. He got out of the hand restraints and it was really dramatic and intense.
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Comment #7 posted by Hope on October 02, 2007 at 10:59:26 PT

Thank you, FoM
Thank you, Ekim. You are very kind.I can't imagine what is wrong. They did a brain scan to see if he had somehow developed brain damage...but all appears to be fine in that area. They were supposed to try some different things today. I'll find out how he is doing, probably tonight.
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Comment #6 posted by FoM on October 02, 2007 at 08:56:41 PT

Hope
Since I don't know anyone that has gone thru Open Heart Surgery I was looking for why Carl would be having this trouble. What I found mentioned the kidneys (Is his output normal) and Liver problems. You can fill me in when you get back home. Let us know here when you hear something. Good Luck!
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Comment #5 posted by ekim on October 02, 2007 at 08:04:27 PT

good luck your way Hope
your a great example to all 
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Comment #4 posted by FoM on October 02, 2007 at 07:55:40 PT

Hope
I am really sorry to here that Carl isn't doing well. I don't know how people react when coming out of heart surgery but it doesn't sound good. I will say a prayer. 
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Comment #3 posted by Hope on October 02, 2007 at 07:45:01 PT

FoM and anyone else who will
FoM, I can't get to my e-mail right now, or I would have sent you an e-mail.I need your prayers for my friend who had the open heart surgery. It's not going well. It's been a week since the surgery and something is wrong. They can't awaken him normally for some reason. He needs help badly.When they try to bring him back to conciousness, his heart rate goes wild and he starts thrashing horribly. They have him strapped down because of it. He's still in ICU after a week. Sometimes he starts thrashing, even though he's unconcious. The thrashing is so severe that they are having to keep him sedated, even though he should have been awakened long ago. It's not good at all. He's still on a ventilator and still having to be kept unconcious since the surgery, which was a week ago. He needs help, badly.Thank you.
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Comment #2 posted by FoM on October 02, 2007 at 07:31:16 PT

Thanks Treeanna

I voted. Current results:Should marijuana be legalized? Yes -- 80.20 % -- (235) No -- 18.43 % -- (54) No opinion -- 1.37 % -- (4) Total votes: 293 
 

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Comment #1 posted by Treeanna on October 02, 2007 at 07:27:55 PT

Poll at this paper
If you go to the homesite of this paper, and scroll down on the right side, they have a poll today about legalizing MJ.
http://www.theunion.com/section/NEWS

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