cannabisnews.com: Looking for a Place To Light Up Legally in London Looking for a Place To Light Up Legally in London Posted by CN Staff on January 24, 2004 at 17:11:30 PT By Amelia Hill Source: Observer UK Rolling up a joint in the toilet of St Paul's Cathedral isn't my usual Friday morning habit but it seemed as good a place as any to start testing the confusion over the Government's new cannabis laws. Cannabis will be downgraded on Thursday from a class B to class C drug, a category which covers the least harmful of the illegal drugs including GHB, anabolic steroids and tranquillisers such as Valium. On paper, the law is fairly straightforward but on the streets, the line is less clear: some police forces have said they will continue to operate a strict 'arrest all' policy even for possession of small amounts while in other areas, officers admit users will simply receive a caution. Having invested in a packet of Ginseng herbal cigarettes and some Rizlas, I spend a happy half-hour locked in the cathedral toilets perfecting the origami twists that create the sleek cones that shriek 'spliff' to even the least drugwise mind. Our national stiff upper lip would make it too easy for people to ignore me, I decided, if I simply sat in prominent locations around London, puffing on my pseudo-joint. Instead, I decide to ask permission: first to smoke, then, brandishing my reefer, to spark up. I am admiring a line of perfectly rolled spliffs on the ledge of the cathedral toilet when I hear two security guards starting their rounds. Hurriedly collecting together my stash, I flee to the other side of the room, leaving a messy scattering of Rizla remains, roach cast-offs and herb fragments behind. 'Oh look, someone's been a naughty girl,' one guard cheerfully says, emerging from my cubicle with the paraphernalia cupped in her hand. 'Wish my Friday could start as early,' her colleague replies. 'Is there any left over?' They prod at the remains, then wander off sadly, discussing handbags. At Tate Modern, I buy a coffee and ask if I can smoke. A waiter points to the balcony. 'You can go out there,' he says. I produce my mammoth spliff. There is a gasp from the schoolboys in the queue behind me. Can I smoke this? I ask. He barely hesitates: 'Of course,' he says with a sweet, complicit smile. 'It's a nice view out there to relax with.' The woman at the central reception of St Thomas' Hospital in Lambeth directs me outside to smoke. I produce the joint and she registers it calmly, with the air of someone regularly asked much worse. I try for a second opinion and target a doctor and nurse. Perhaps less hardened to the unpredictable demands of the public, the nurse doubles up in hilarity when I produce the joint. 'I don't see a problem: the law has changed, hasn't it?' says the doctor. 'You should probably be discreet though; choose somewhere quiet.' As I move away, the nurse turns to the doctor: 'It was polite of her to ask though, wasn't it?' Staff at the neighbouring Guy's Hospital are less welcoming. 'What are you doing?' shrieks the woman at reception. Convinced such behaviour must be proof of foreign blood, she mimes handcuffs and speaks slowly. 'You'll be arrested. Put. It. Away.' Outside, a security guard saunters up. 'Do you need anything?' he asks. I recognise him from the reception at Guy's and he looks from left to right before gesturing discreetly. 'Come with me,' he says, leading me round to the back of the hospital to a quiet but still very public park. 'You can probably get away with it here,' he says. Then: 'I don't suppose you have any spare, do you?' In the old County Hall building that now houses the imposing Marriott hotel, I ask an immacutely suited manager where I can smoke. He beams and expansively gestures around him: 'Anywhere madam, we're delighted for you to smoke wherever is most comfortable for you.' I produce the spliff and he takes a step back. Swallowing, he shakes his head. 'Madam, please. No, you can't smoke that in here.' 'Why not?' I ask. I say I had read in the papers this morning that it was now legal. He turns ashen. 'You can't smoke that in here,' he repeats, more firmly. I persist. What would happen if I did? His eyes flick to and fro desperately across the deserted reception. There is no one to help him. He takes a stab in the dark. 'Umm. I'd be forced to escort you from the building?' he guesses. I am at least seven inches taller than him and I can almost hear his buttocks clenching in horror at the prospect. I relent and, leaving unescorted, immediately find a more sympathetic friend in a security guard for the hotel who happily gives me a light and offers to share his ashtray. In the streets behind the drugs and vice headquarters at Charing Cross police station, two young policemen are just finishing their rounds. 'What would happen if I started smoking this?' I ask, producing the spliff. They blanche. 'Put that away while you're talking to us,' one says. 'Put it this way - if you were smoking that in your car, you would be arrested.' But aren't you allowed to smoke in private premises? I ask; isn't a car private? There is a pause. 'That's true,' he concedes. He looks tense. 'Well, perhaps if you were in a car, travelling slowly in a built-up area, you'd be arrested,' he tries. What about personal use? I ask. I wave the spliff around again. I've hardly got any dope at all in this, I say. 'The amount you've got there is clearly for personal use, so that's fine,' says the second officer. 'So if I was smoking this in my car, that would be legal?' I ask. 'I thought you said ... ' He breaks in: 'You're confusing us now: I'd just advise you to take it home and smoke it there. 'The truth of the matter is that the exact rules haven't filtered down to us yet, so we're none of us too sure,' he tries to smile. 'Please, miss, please put it away now.' I collar another pair of officers. 'It's different in different areas of London,' explains one. 'If you want to smoke that, I'd suggest you crossed over to Lambeth.' 'We're more prudish here,' his younger colleague adds, folding his arms behind his back. 'Put that away now, miss, you're embarrassing me.' I persist and they ditch their libertarian approach. 'If you don't put that away, miss, I could arrest and search you,' says the older officer. 'Then I will go to your home and turn it over.' 'We're off now to oversee the changing of the guards at the Palace, so please,' he adds. 'So just take yourself and your cannabis and go home.' The Bridge Bar at London Bridge train station is frantic with commuters and thick with cigarette smoke. 'It's OK for you to smoke but not for us and our lungs,' a barman crossly replies to my question. I produce the spliff. Is it also ok to smoke this? His face lights up in delight. 'I wish you could; I wish I could help you smoke it too.' A small crowd of barmen gather but scatter as the manager arrives. He is less amused. 'You can't do that here: It's not law yet.' So when it becomes law, can I smoke it then? 'Yes,' he says, then in a blast of creativity, he adds. 'But we need to get a certificate. We've applied for one and it should arrive soon; perhaps next week.' 'Then will I be able to smoke here?' 'Absolutely,' he assures me. The harried staff at the station are less inventive. 'The laws haven't changed yet,' the stationmaster tells me. 'If you smoke here, I'll have to have you arrested.' His friend interrupts to say it'll be legal next week. 'Can I come back and smoke this then?' I ask. The stationmaster adopts a hunted look. He tries to back away but his friend is blocking his exit route. 'Miss, this is a busy time,' he begs. 'Please, won't you please move aside?' As the night draws in, the French staff at Cafe Rouge in Hay's Galleria, near Tower Bridge, are utterly unfazed by my request. 'But of course,' they smile. 'The boss is not here so you must be free to do whatever you want. It is no trouble to us.' They bring me matches and lean on the bar, watching approving as I roll a fresh joint and finally puff away.Note: Amelia Hill takes her faux joint out on the town to test people's awareness of changing laws on cannabis. Special Report: Drugs in Britain: http://www.guardian.co.uk/drugs/0,2759,178206,00.htmlSource: Observer, The (UK)Author: Amelia Hill Published: Sunday, January 25, 2004Copyright: 2004 The ObserverContact: letters observer.co.ukWebsite: http://www.observer.co.uk/Related Articles:Stay Cool on Cannabis http://cannabisnews.com/news/thread18203.shtmlEnd The Confusion Over Cannabis http://cannabisnews.com/news/thread18159.shtml Home Comment Email Register Recent Comments Help Comment #2 posted by jose melendez on January 24, 2004 at 19:57:24 PT ha! I've been keeping a portion of a hand rolled cigarette around for constitutional challenge bait.Dankhank, you could use some of that herbal smoke in the magazines and smokeshops as a faux spliff. Make sure you've got more than one video camera ready, with hot batteries and fresh tape! [ Post Comment ] Comment #1 posted by Dankhank on January 24, 2004 at 17:34:13 PT Pretty sweet ... Can't wait 'till I can do that in my town. I practice every day. Looks like things are gonna be fun in old London town. Another brick from the wall ... [ Post Comment ] Post Comment